Happy 18th Birthday!

18 years ago today, I became a father for a second time, when my son, Dimitri, was born. It is truly amazing to watch them grow from this…..

….to this….

“Don’t Blink” they say. True words.

He was always a bit more athletic than my oldest son. He loved to play T-ball, and I got to be his coach.

In high school, he took an interest in golf, and I loved being able to get out and shoot 18 holes with him.

There was never a dull moment when he was around. I was DJing an event one time, and had some music programmed ahead of time. I had left the stage for a minute to give out prizes and when I returned he had donned my headphones, put on some gold shades, and was acting like he was spinning tunes!

After my wife and I got back from Florida (and getting married), the first day back and went and watched him in his first play. He was actually very good and even sang on stage.

18 years have flown by, son. I know that life hasn’t always been easy, but I want you to know that no matter what, I love you. I am behind you 100%. If you need to talk about anything, you can come to me and I will listen without judgement. I can promise you that I will always be here for you.

You are officially an adult today. As you begin this new phase of your life, remember that the world is good at throwing you curveballs. Keep your eyes forward. Get up when you are knocked down. Never let emotions influence a decision. Forgive. Love. Be YOU.

I love you, son. Happy birthday!

Turntable Talk 21 – Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner

Once again, Dave Ruch from A Sound Day has offered up an interesting topic for this month’s Turntable Talk. I see it as being a way for each of us writers to offer you a bit of ourselves. I mean, any time I write something, it usually has something that gives the reader a glimpse at who I am. In some blogs I read, there are a lot of facts and not much of the author. I’ve come to “know” many of the participants through their past submissions, but this month I feel we’re going to get a bit more personal.

This month, Dave presented us with the following instructions:

It’s almost time for Christmas dinner (even if you aren’t necessarily prone to celebrating Christmas, play along) and there’s one more seat at the table. Because of the magic that is Christmas, you can invite any one musician (or person from the music world) to be your guest. Even if they’ve passed away, they can be at your table for a meal, and a few stories. So, who would you invite? And any little musical gift you hope they might possibly come with?

As with past topics, one possibility jumped out immediately. I decided to think a bit more before I made that final decision. Oh! The list of names that I came up with! It was a long one that included Elvis Presley, Mel Torme’, Nat King Cole, Bobby Darin, Roy Orbison, Doc Severinsen, Louis Prima, Frank Sinatra, Paul McCartney, Tony Bennett, Reba McEntire, Michael Buble’, and so many more! In the end, I stuck with the first name that came to mind – Dean Martin.

To this day, Dean remains my favorite singer. His laid back, carefree, and effortless approach is part of the charm that makes him so likable to me. So many of his songs hold special memories for me.

I imagine him showing up dressed to the nines in his staple tuxedo, knowing he is the guest of honor. However, I also picture him as a humble man who gets along with everyone.

Naturally, on Christmas I’d make the dish that was always served by my grandma – Ravioli. I’d be sure to make the homemade sauce for him. I’d always seen pictures of him and John Wayne eating pasta together. I’d love to hear those stories.

I feel like we could easily talk about the similarities between his folks and my grandparents (both from the old country). I know he was a fairly private guy, but I would enjoy hearing his stories about growing up in that Italian family.

The conversation would naturally turn to music. I’d have so many questions for him. The recording process has always fascinated me. On some of the newer releases they’d include some of the in between take studio chatter. Dean always seemed to be joking around and I bet he’d have some great stories about that.

Not to mention all the stars he personally knew and hung out with. I bet he could have wrote a book full of Sinatra stories! If you look back on the guests who were on his TV show, on the TV roasts, or actors who were in movies with him – it is truly an amazing group. How could he just pick one or two stories to tell when he knew so many people!?

I certainly wouldn’t want to pressure him, but I think it would be very cool to be sitting around the table and for him to give us a few measures of a Christmas song. I remember watching how people often just sang with each other back in the day. Would Dean duet with me on Marshmallow World? Who knows?

As someone who really stinks up the golf course, I’d probably bug Dean for a few golf tips. He was SO good at it, I’m sure just one little piece of advice on my grip, my stance or my swing would help me tremendously!

I’m not sure what musical gift I would hope for him to bring, but I would certainly love to get my hands on one of two things. He once had his own brand of golf balls! I’d never use them, of course, but I would love to have a box!

I would also like to have a bottle of his spirits. At one time he had a few types of his own booze!

I don’t really drink, but I think it would be awesome to have these sitting on a bar.

I suppose I’d only have one more request – a photo with him. That may be pushing the limits, so I might just have to have the camera lying around so that someone could snap some candids of the the two of us together.

I’m sure he’d be the one to want to cut the evening short. “Look, pallie, I’d love to stay and answer all your questions, but I have a 7 o’clock tee time in the morning ….” I’d totally be ok with that.

Thanks to Dave for a great topic! I cannot wait to read the guests that our other writers come up with!

How about you? Who would you picki?

Wishing you and yours a VERY Merry Christmas and a blessed 2024!

Conference, Clubs, and Croup

Conference

Many readers know I work in Sleep Medicine. Every year there is a sleep conference in Detroit that we try to go to to earn our Continuing Education Units to keep our registry. That conference was last week.

Sam and I drove down to Detroit early Thursday afternoon. (The kids got a sleepover at Nana’s house.) The conference took place at one of the casinos. When we checked in, they asked if we wanted an upper or lower floor (we chose upper) and whether we wanted a city or river view (we chose river). It was a nice view!

After speakers were done on the first night, Sam and I went to a small mixer where guests could have a drink together. We hung out with a couple of my coworkers and folks who graduated from the same sleep program. They had raffles while we were there and Sam won a Tim Hortons gift card. My coworker won a $100 Amazon card.

We went up to our room and we were exhausted, but hungry. We decided to order room service ($$$$$). She ordered nachos and I got a burger. When it arrived, it was apparent that we should have just shared the nachos because it was HUGE!!

After the conference on Friday, we had hoped to go out to a nice dinner. Because room service was SO expensive, we decided to get something on the way home. After getting the kids from Nana’s, we ordered pizza and brought it home.

Just a side note: As parents, you can’t wait to get a night or two alone and away from the kids. Of course, when you do, you can’t stop thinking about them and are overjoyed when you see them again!

Clubs

My son, Dimitri, turned 16 on Sunday. I told him I wanted to take him out golfing. It’s something he and I have never done together and I knew it would be a good time for us to connect and chat. We decided to go Saturday morning, and the weather was perfect.

I haven’t been on a course in at least 3-4 years. I knew I was gonna really golf badly. He hasn’t been out in at least a year, since leaving the golf club at school. Thank goodness it was a slow day in the course.

I hate when you’ve always got someone waiting for you to tee off or shoot. I realize it’s part of the game, but I always feel rushed and often just want to hit so we can go. Dimitri and I were far from professionals out there, so it did take us a bit longer than usual. We finally let the twosome behind us play through.

He is like me in that he has his favorite clubs. He rarely uses his driver, but he can crush a ball with his 5 wood. I have a 7 wood that I used to hit well, but topped it every time Saturday. I had a few good drives, just enough to keep me coming back.

We bent the rules a little bit, and had plenty of mulligans (redos), and impost probably a dozen balls in the woods and water. Despite all of that, it was a great time together. He, naturally, beat me by two strokes. I can’t wait to do it again.

Croup

Sam called me while I was out golfing and said that both kids sounded sick. Both had low grade fevers and a cough. By the time I got home, Ella was sounding better after taking some allergy meds. Andrew’s fever was gone but still had a cough and that raspy voice.

Sam wondered if we should take him to urgent care or ER. Everyone we talked to said wait to see how he was in the morning.

That night at bedtime he cried a lot. He wound up in our bed. He woke us up with a nasty cough and wheezing about 3am. He fell right back to sleep, but it was enough to freak us out a bit.

At 6am he woke up sounding worse, so we rushed him to ER. Nana met us there and brought Ella back to her house. We planned to be there a while and Sam packed loads of snacks just in case.

They got us right back and he was seen almost immediately. We weren’t sure what to expect because we were there right at shift change. However, once we were in our room, the nurse came in, followed by the doc. Once the examination was done, she told us it was croup and she gave him a steroid and told us he should be back to normal in a couple days.

How fast were they? Well, we had finished with the nurse and the doctor AND the meds were administered all before the registration gal came to our room! We actually had to wait to get registered before we could leave! Total ER time – about 70 minutes.

Ella decided she wanted to have a sleepover again at Nana’s, so when Sam left for work last night it was just me and Andrew. He really improved throughout the day. Before bed, we stood on the porch and watched the thunderstorm together.

Andrew is still sleeping and Ella should be home later today. The house should return to it’s normal chaotic state shortly after her arrival.

My Personal Space

Today’s blog stems from a Daily Writing Prompt and something my oldest son told me over the weekend. My sons and my ex are moving into a new place. It has a basement and my son was excited because he and his brother were told that they could make it into their very own man cave. The prompt that was in my email today reads, “If money were not an object, and you could build your own man cave, what would it contain?”

Oh, The Possibilities!

As I contemplated this, my first thought was, “I’m gonna need a big space!” I’ve read articles on the internet about “Great Man Caves” and also seen some of those home improvement shows where the builders give the guy a man cave. I admit some of my ideas are stolen from those, but many are just things that I would love to have.

A Good Sound System

This is a MUST! It would be something that I where could incorporate audio and video. I’d want to be able to play vinyl records, CD’s, cassettes, reel to real and digital audio through it. With the video aspect, I’d want to be able to watch stuff on live TV, streaming, and of course DVD/Blue Ray.

I love the idea of a home theater with comfy chairs, maybe recliners, and stadium-type seating.

While I don’t do a whole lot of drinking anymore, the above photo suggests that a bar with bar stools would certainly look cool.

I’ve always loved playing pool, even though I was never very good at it. I think a nice pool table would have to be a part of the design. One photo I stumbled on also had a golf simulator in it! This would be excellent! I don’t get out on the course enough, and during the Michigan winters, I could just tee off in the man cave!

Speaking of golf, the only golfing I am doing lately is on the Xbox. I usually shoot a round before I turn in for the night. That being said, having a gaming area would be neat to have. If money was not an object, I could buy every system and people could play whatever system they wanted to.

I’d also like a way to be able to switch whatever system I am playing onto the main TV and sound through the sound system!

If I had my own man cave, I’d have to invite the gang over to play pinochle or poker. I’d want to have a good card table to do that.

I’d have to have something on the walls – maybe some framed Detroit sports jerseys?

Or some movie posters?

Or maybe a display of various action figures?

Pinball games or arcade games are also a possibility

Now that I think about it, if I have the space, having a bowling alley in my man cave would be pretty cool too!

Speaking of bowling, there was something else we used to do at the bowling alley. After we were done for the day, we would all head into the bar area and play shuffle board. I was never any good at it, but it was certainly a lot of fun to play. A shuffle board game would also be great to add.

The above picture has another cool idea – a train that runs above the space! That Railroad Crossing sign is pretty sweet, too!

Somewhere in the man cave, I would like to have three private areas – first a restroom. It’s important to have one of those readily available. I’m sure it would have a theme – classic movies, classic comedy, or just something “manly”

Second, I would like an office area. It could be somewhere I could work, read or just relax.

Finally, I would love to have a private recording studio. With it I could do voice over work. I’d still love to do commercials, or maybe narrate an audio book, do a podcast, and it has always been a dream to have a home studio.

A personal space – a man cave – is nice to think about. Perhaps one day ….

Stress Relief

I would not consider myself a “gamer.” I know plenty of them. They have special headphones with microphones so they can talk to other people in the game that they are playing. Sam’s brothers are often playing games and we can hear the other players talking to them often. My older sons also play a lot of games, and connect with players on them as well.

When I sit down in front of the Xbox One, I usually grab the golf game that I play. I can play a round of golf in like 20 minutes. I usually play a round after the kids are asleep. Sometimes, I will play two rounds. I have yet to be on a real course this year, and this in a way makes me feel like I am golfing.

I rarely get more than 20-45 minutes before I am ready to head to bed. This week, however, the stress of things mentioned in previous blogs had me to the point where I was not tired enough to go to sleep. The golf game was not going to be something that eased the stress, so I looked through the games the boys have at my house. I found one that would certainly allow me to release some stress.

Forza Horizon 5 is a racing game. My sons have 3, 4 and 5 at my house. In the game, you can challenge other drivers to head to head races, you can participate in racing events, find old cars in barns located throughout the country (FH5 takes place in Mexico), and test your driving skills in various road conditions.

What I love about it is that you can crash up your car in hundreds of ways and it still runs! You can side swipe cars, hit them head on, flip your car, fall of bridges, and more – and the car will always go when you accelerate. Even better, no matter how many accidents you have, your insurance doesn’t go up (rimshot)!

Throughout the game you can win new cars, find old cars and fix them up, people can gift you new cars, and your garage continuously grows. There are plenty of opportunities to win money with the events you race in, and by earning spins on a prize wheel. Since I started fresh, I only have a few cars. My favorite is an old Ford Bronco which is great for driving off road.

The weather can change throughout the game as well. One of the events is driving through this ridiculous huge storm. Lightning can strike trees as you drive by and more. Obviously, the cars handle differently on wet roads, too. Since this game takes place in Mexico, there are also races through sand storms!

As silly as it sounds, this dumb game is a fantastic stress reliever. It is fun to just drive around with the various cars and see how each one handles. Most of the time, I really suck at driving. I swerve and fishtail A LOT! I’ve gotten pretty good at doing 180’s and 360’s, and at times I feel like I’m one of the Duke boys driving the General Lee!

As much as it relieves stress, it also makes me laugh. Recently I watched as I accidently drove off a cliff and the car rolled and flipped downward. That car must have hit every boulder on the side of the cliff on the way down. Yet, when it hit the ground, I just kept on driving. With each flip I found myself chuckling louder and louder. It was so crazy!

Sometimes, there is a rare occasion where your car will get stuck. Ever find yourself saying, “I wish life had a rewind button?” Guess what. This game has one. You can actually rewind the action to avoid an accident or your speed. That is usually how I get out of those “stuck” moments.

There are various “skill” points you can earn throughout the game, too. They have Speed Traps, where the idea is to get to the highest speed you can between two points. My favorite thing is called “Danger Signs.” These are usually where you have a point where you jump off a ramp or a cliff. I think you get points for how high you jump and how long you are in the air. Again, it’s like the Dukes of Hazzard!

Am I a gamer? No. I just use them for stress relief…..

The only thing missing is the “Yeeeeeeeee- hawwww!”

Celebrating My Children!

In the Bible, in Psalm 127:3-5, it reads:

“(3) Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. (4) As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. (5) Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them”

My quiver has been blessed four times! I am certainly a lucky man to have been chosen by God to be a father to my children. Each of them, different in their own special way, fill my heart and soul.

Dante’

My first born. He’s the one who made me “dad” for the first time. He is probably the most like me. He has a love for old music, old movies, and loves information on older celebrities. He is loud and boisterous at times, but is also a gentle soul who loves to help people. His random acts of kindness make me so proud of him. He’s a hard worker who loves to have fun and loves to be surrounded by friends. In a sense, he is my “Mini-Me.” He is currently studying hard with college and continues to thrive!

Dimitri

My second born. He is also a bit like me, but in another way. Now a high schooler, I see him mimicking many of my study “habits,” which is probably not good. I was the same way – waiting till the last minute to do homework or projects, forgetting to do things I need to and only doing the things that I WANTED to do, and never really studying like I should. I try to use those things as “teaching opportunities” with him. He is, however, a typical teenager right now. He is learning how to golf, so I cannot wait to go play a round (and rounds) with him. He has a bright future and in the years ahead, I know he will do great things!

Not unless there is a miracle

After some tests, I was asked if I was done having children. At the time, I was. The doctor said this was good, because based on the test results, I only had about a 4% chance of ever having more children.

After my divorce, and after I remarried, my wife and I discussed children. She is younger than me and wanted children. Knowing what I knew, it would take a miracle to have more. We discussed adoption at one point and even looked into other methods of getting pregnant. Then the miracle came ….

Ella

I will never forget the day Sam told me that we were having a baby. I will never forget they day we found out that our miracle was going to be a girl! I will never forget the day that she was born. For some reason, God decided that I would once again be a daddy and he sent me this beautiful little girl. What a joy it was to relive the first tooth, the first steps, the first words, and all the things that come with having a baby. She is so smart!! She excels at so many things! She her laughter is music to my ears. When she breaks out in song, I could listen all day. I love our moments playing Little People, reading books, and watching Bluey together. She is my sweet princess and I look forward to those special daddy/daughter moments.

Andrew

Another miracle! Ella was about a year old when we found out that Sam was once again expecting. It was truly a huge surprise to both of us! He is the opposite of Ella in so many ways. We never had to baby proof anything with her, but he is always into something. He is WAY ahead of where he should be. He was walking early and no doubt will be talking early. He is doing all he can to keep up with his sister. He is one of the happiest babies. There is something about his smile that just makes everything better. His laughter is just as musical as Ella’s. His first year is flying by and I look forward to teaching him to throw a baseball and those great father/son things.

My dear children –

Thank you for each being so special to me. I am so honored to be your father. I love you with every ounce of my being. I hope that I will live up to the responsibility that God has given me to teach you, to raise you, and to prepare you for life. In the time ahead, I will be happy to listen to you, to help you, or to give advice. I promise to be here for you till the end of my days.

Love always,

Dad

Prompt: That Was Then, This Is Now

Maggie, at From Cave Walls, and Lauren, at LSS Attitude of Gratitude, alternate hosting Throwback Thursday. The idea of the prompt is for them to give us a topic and for us to write a post in which we share our own memories or experiences about the given topic.

This week’s prompt is: That Was Then And This Is Now “Growing up, we all had dreams and aspirations. I’d like you to think back about what you were like and what you wanted as a kid compared to the adult choices you made.

Here are the questions and my responses:

When you were a kid, did you like your name? Would you have changed it if you could? Do you like it now?

I suppose I liked my name growing up. I really didn’t have a reason not to like it. I was the only Keith in my class and I was ok with that. It always bugged me that people always spelled it wrong, even though I know why (i before e, except after c – so everyone spelled it Kieth).

I really don’t think I would change it. I wasn’t even aware that a name change was possible, and then I found out my dad had actually legally changed his name from Salvatore to Sam, which everyone called him.

Yes, I like it just fine.

As a kid, what always brought a smile to your face? What about now, as an adult? (family-friendly please)

As a kid – summer and all that came with it: vacations, baseball games with friends, trips up north, running through the sprinkler. As an adult, my family. My children make me smile everyday. My wife also makes me smile. The times that we can all be together are priceless.

What was the most important lesson your parents taught you? Did you pass that lesson down to your family? The most important lesson(s) I learned from my parents was to always be supportive, respectful and responsible. I hope that I have passed that down in the way I have parented my children.

Are there talents you started as a child that you still have? If so, what are they?

I don’t know that I would call it a talent, but I always seemed to be able to make people laugh, I truly try to bring levity and fun to wherever I go. I also seem to be good at whipping off some sort of silly rhyme on command. I am a far cry from Nipsey Russell, but I get by.

Is there something you regret not doing or starting when you were young? What was it?

This is sort of a loaded question, because I think I am where I am at today because of where I have been and the decisions made along the way (good and bad). I do regret not going to college right away, but it was probably better that I didn’t. I’m sure I would have flunked out. I also wish I had learned to play the guitar at a young age. My dad recently gave me an acoustic guitar that I hope to try to teach myself.

Did you have more close friends as a kid or as an adult? Any idea why?

I would guess I have more close friends today than I did as a kid. I had a couple good friends growing up (and they are still good friends today), but I think we were kind of the “weird kids” and we all decided to just hang out with each other. As far as “why,” I am not sure. The ones who were important to me still are. They are the ones I confide in, complain to, and share with.

Where did you go to think as a kid? Where do you go now?

As a kid I would often walk up to the elementary school and sit on the swings to think. I spent hours there, sometimes alone and sometimes with a friend. When I got my license, I would drive up to Jefferson Ave and sit by the water. On occasion, I would get to watch a moon rise which was spectacular. Now, I would guess I drive around in my car or go for a walk. If the weather is not ideal, I guess I think in bed.

What would be the name of the chapter of your life from 10 – 18? What would the name be the name of the chapter of your life currently?

Wow, that’s tough. That’s an entire 8 year span and so much was going on. Perhaps it might be called, “Finding Myself” or ” Struggle” or “What Next?” The chapter name for my life currently might easily be “A Wonderful New Beginning” or “The Second Chance” or “Happily Ever After.”

What wonderful thing happened in your adult life that your child self could never have imagined?

Divorce might not be what you expect to see in this answer, and as a child, I never thought it would happen to me. But it was a “wonderful” thing that brought about the opportunity to meet and marry my soul mate and have two more children.

Would your child self like your adult self? Why or why not?

I would think that my child self would like my adult self. After all, we both have the same taste in movies, music, and TV. We also love baseball, golf, and football. We also love the same types of books. I’d think we’d have plenty in common …

I’d love to see your answers to these questions, too!

Weekend Review

A lot of people complain about Mondays, but I really don’t because my “week” starts on Tuesday. It is usually the day that I sit back and reflect on the happenings of the weekend.

“Golf” With My Son

I came home from work on Saturday morning and slept for a couple hours before going to pick up my youngest son. As I mentioned in a previous blog, I haven’t really got the chance to see him much, so I was excited to have a day with him.

He is currently taking golf lessons and hopes to make the school golf team. I bought some foam practice golf balls for him to whack around in the back yard. He didn’t bring his clubs, so I let him hit with a few of mine. He’s actually not bad. He tends to overthink on occasion, but when he gets all the mechanics right, he can really connect with the ball.

I’d really hoped to find time to take him on the course this summer, but it never happened. I realize that there is still time and it is actually cheaper with the fall rates, but with the baby due any time, I don’t want to make plans.

I am actually happy that he has taken such an interest in the game. It is one thing that, if he continues, I know we can do together. We don’t get too much time together, and a round of golf would be perfect for spending quality time together.

He’s quite the video gamer, and probably spends too much time playing them. I have a golf game that I play on the XBox that I love. It is a perfect way for me to relieve some stress. I can play a full round of golf in about 20 minutes.

I let him try it this weekend and he loved it, too. I like the game because I actually shoot better on it than on a real golf course! In the game I shoot more birdies than bogies….in real life, it’s the other way around.

I took him home early Sunday because he was supposed to go the the orchard with his mom. Later that night I texted him and asked if he had fun at the orchard and he responded that they didn’t go. That made me feel bad, because it would have been nice to have spent more time with him.

Good Deed

Our neighborhood has a Facebook group page. On Sunday I noticed that there was a neighbor that needed her lawn cut. After checking with my wife to make sure she didn’t have me running errands, I responded and said I could come and cut it. She asked how much I charged, and I told her I wasn’t going to do it for money. I just like being a good neighbor. We have so many people who help us with little things (more on that in a second), that I like to help when I can.

Come to find out the neighbor’s husband had surgery recently and is unable to do much walking. He can’t really cut the lawn right now. They had someone who cut it for a while, but they were not available this week.

I had been out walking with Ella and saw the house while I was walking. There was a big wood fence, but I wasn’t sure if it swung open. I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to get my riding mower in the back yard. So I called her at the number she posted. I asked if that gate moved and she said yes. Ella was playing in the back ground and she heard her.

Once I laid Ella down for her nap, I drove my lawnmower four streets over to cut her grass. As I started to go into the back yard, she came out to talk. Her husband was out in the backyard and she introduced me to him. We had a pleasant chat and she said that was going to leave a bag on the side porch for Ella.

When I got home, I placed the bag on our porch and cut our grass. When Ella woke up, I showed her the bag, which contained some chocolates and a unicorn Beanie Baby. She thought that was so cute. My neighbor didn’t have to do anything at all, I was just glad to be able to help her.

A Step in the Right Direction

Our neighbor two doors down is the best! He helps everyone. When I first moved in with Sam, he was mowing her lawn with his riding mower. One day I was outside with her and he drove up on the mower. He told me to sit down on it and he showed me everything I needed to know to mow. He told me I could come down and use it whenever I needed to. Since getting my mower, I have been able to help him out and let him borrow mine when he is down.

At any rate, we both happened to be outside and I was about the fix the side porch step. I had searched in the garage for some wood screws I thought I had, but couldn’t find them. He walked over and there was some small talk. I asked if he had any wood screws. I showed him the porch and he said he would be right back.

He came down with pieces of left over composite wood from when they built his deck this summer. He also has his saw and corner square tool. He pulled up the old wood, and measured out the size we’d need and cut a couple of pieces from that deck wood. He secured them with some really good screws and the job was done in like 10 minutes. I asked him what I owed him and his answer was the same that I gave the lady whose grass I cut – “Nothing.”

Needless to say, that step is about as secure as it has ever been and I am grateful for such great neighbors.

Reflecting on 2019 …

innovation-summer-reading-ripple-effect-payments

As the year draws to a close, I have pondered about what I wanted to write about. Some of the blogs I follow have posted “Year End” Top Ten lists featuring their 10 most read blogs of the year. Others have written rants about the old year, and posted resolutions for the new year. Yet another blogger posted a 50 question “Year End Reflection” post, where he answered questions about the old year and the new year.

It is often very easy to diss on the year as it draws to a close. I do it often. In the last week or so I have heard so many people talk about how awful 2019 was and how they cannot wait for the new year, so they can start fresh. I used to do that, too. Granted, I know many people who truly have endured a very bad year. I know too many people whose parents have passed away, gone through a divorce, survived terrible accidents, lost their jobs, and many other things. I can totally understand how looking back can be difficult.

I think it is often easier to focus on the bad things, because those are the things that tend to stay with you. Personally, I made a list of some things that I recalled from the past year that could go onto the “bad things” list. I then decided to make a list of all the good things. Jotting down things from memory, it was no surprise that the good list outnumbered the bad. To further the point, I grabbed my phone and went back through a year’s worth of pictures and was reminded of many other things that happened, which all ended up on the “good things” list.

Quick Review of My Year

In January, Sam and I went to the Detroit Opera House with my dad, Rose, and my cousin Dianne to see The Phantom of the Opera. I had never seen it before and I loved it. Since Sam talked me into seeing Wicked last year, I have come to appreciate some of these wonderful productions.

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In March, Sam and I celebrated our one year wedding anniversary with a trip to Cleveland. Many joked about the fact that we went to Ohio, and I can see how that might be funny. We really had a great time at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and a visit to The Christmas Story House. As a bonus, we got to grab dinner with my brother while we were down there.

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April brought about a couple celebrations. My son, Dante’ turned 17 and we had a small get together with his friends at our house. It was quite a loud party with all of his friends there! Then we celebrated Sam’s graduation on the west side of the state. I still beam with pride at all she has accomplished!

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May was a busy month. My nieces and nephew ran us ragged at Peppa Pig World, Dimitri was in good voice at his choir concert, and the boys and I went with my father-in-law, and brothers-in-law to the Three Stooges Festival in Redford. I also celebrated another birthday, and Sam bought me the most amazing gift – a record player. I have since enjoyed looking at used record stores for more vinyl to play on it. That gift also led to Sam and I sharing our first dance together.

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Summer was very busy! I got the chance to golf with my friends Matt and Shawn, went to the zoo and the beach with the boys, went to carnivals, visited many ice cream places, played mini-golf, and had many bonfires! In June, I spoke at a Sleep Conference in Detroit, we celebrated Dimitri’s Birthday, Sam’s birthday, and she shared the news that we were expecting. This is one of many favorite memories of the year!

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In July, we went to our OB/GYN and got the first glimpse of our baby. At this point, we did not know the gender, and were calling her “Baby P”. On August 30, we decided to go to a place near us that would be able to tell us the gender a bit earlier than our OB/GYN. It was at this appointment that we found out we were having a girl. This would be another of my favorite memories of the year. In August, we also took Dante’ around town on the hottest day of the year to try to get some Senior pictures taken, and shared with my dad that he would soon be holding a granddaughter. It was also fun to have the boys go on a scavenger hunt to find out they were getting a sister!

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In September, I spent the day at a work conference called “The Power to Choose”, which was a truly wonderful experience. There were many great speakers and I was so glad to be able to attend. I walked away from this day with some great tools to use with patients and in life in general. On September 25, we got “official” confirmation from our OB/GYN, that Baby P was indeed a girl!

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My brother visited us in October, and Sam allowed me to take Baby Bump Picture #1. Baby Bump Picture #2 came in November in front of the Christmas tree – a picture that I will treasure forever! November was very busy as we were showered with love from family and friends at the baby shower. We took our annual trip to Bronner’s Christmas Wonderland and bought our yearly ornament for the Christmas tree. We enjoyed the Christmas light display at the Detroit Zoo, and construction began on the baby’s bedroom/nursery.

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December brought my staff Christmas party, which was full of hearty laughter! Sam and I attended our birthing classes, and I learned how to breathe (and hopefully not pass out). We celebrated Christmas with the boys on Christmas Eve, spent time with Sam’s family Christmas Day, and celebrated with my dad and Rose over the weekend. I have spent way too much time at work, due to where the holidays fell. I have also been working some extra shifts at one radio station, and doing my normal shift at the other radio station. In between all of that, we’ve been sanding and painting the new hallway and the baby’s room (only adding to the excitement of her arrival!).

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As I look back, I am inclined to quote Frank Sinatra and say “It was a VERY good year!” Have you taken the time to really look back at the things that happened over the last year? One thing that I noticed about the “bad things” on my list was that I was surrounded by good friends, and family who helped me through those “bad” times. That, in itself, takes a bad and makes it sort of good, right?

Frank Sinatra also sang, “Regrets? I’ve had a few…” One of the daily writing prompts for December asked “What is biggest regret of the past year?” I would say stopping Weight Watchers. I am in no way, shape, or form blaming Sam, but I gotta tell you…it’s hard to diet when you live with a pregnant person. Yeah, I know, I should be able to control myself, but all too often, when I went out to get her something she was craving…I got something, too! LOL. I have already resolved to get “back on the wagon” after the first of the year!

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In closing, I hope that each one of my readers can look back over 2019, and find some really good times! I hope you can recall happy memories. I hope you can find the good that accompanied the bad. I hope you can find the positives, and focus on those things. 2020 brings a new year, a new “book” if you will. That “book” contains 365 pages and YOU are the author of each page. I am looking forward to writing our books together. Feel free to reach out if you ever need a friend – I am here!

May 2020 be a happy and healthy year! May it be full of joy and happiness! May it be full of friends and family! May it be positively the best yet!

Thanks for reading! Cheers!

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Three Birthday Tributes

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Today I would like to salute three of my closest friends. I guess, in a way, I am taking the easy way out by including all three of them in one blog. I am doing it this way because they all celebrate birthdays this month. So here are some thoughts on three great guys.

Joe – October 15

Joe is my Polish brother. He says that I am his Italian brother. The great Red Buttons used to joke that “there is only one difference between the Polish and the Italians – One year of high school!” We truly are like brothers. Joe and I met in junior high school. We had band 1st hour. It was in this class that I also met Steve K, who you will hear about shortly. We all hit it off immediately, and have been friends ever since.

In high school, I used to pick Joe up and drive him to school. He used to run out of the house with a bowl of cereal in his hand. I remember that cereal was Fruit Islands. They don’t make it anymore, but the commercials had some guy saying “Ayumma yumma”. Not sure why, but I will always remember that.

All of the guys I am talking about were in band. Steve K, Joe, and I all graduated the same year. Steve M, graduated before us. Joe and I were band officers. We were both librarians. That meant we were responsible for all the music. We copied it and made sure the parts were placed in the right folders for band members. Our senior year, Joe was head librarian and I was band president. We spent many hours after school working on music and hanging with the band director and custodian. We were probably more of an annoyance than anything!

Bill, the custodian, was such a cool guy! He invited us to his wedding! We used to pick a day and he would make sure not to bring lunch that day. We’d order a pizza from Sorrento’s and eat it in the band room. We’d sit around telling stories and laughing. Such fun times!

There was a brief period where I switched from trumpet to tuba. Joe was the lone tuba player. I played tuba at the commencement ceremonies for the class of 87, and then played it briefly for marching band. I was asked by the band director to switch back to trumpet. He said we needed more trumpets – but now that I think about it, maybe I was just a real crappy tuba player!

It seems like Joe and I have been golfing and bowling together for as long as I can remember. I remember bowling at this little hole in the wall dump in St. Clair Shores with Joe. It was always such fun there, and we are still friends with many of the folks we met there. Eventually we joined a league at Pastime Lanes. It was there we made more friendships, and I watched him bowl a 300 game. Pastime is long gone, but we still have many memories there.

Steve K, Joe and I all golfed for Senior Skip Day. Steve borrowed our buddy Wayne’s golf clubs. On the first tee, he hit the ball, but the club head broke off the driver. The club head went farther than the damn golf ball! Joe and I laughed like hell! One time Joe and I were golfing in Lapeer and there was an electrical wire that went across the fairway. What are the odds that one of us would hit that? Joe did. He teed off – it hit the wire and dropped like a stone in the fairway.

We used to play pinochle over at Joe’s parents house till all hours of the night. Their house was just one of many houses that hosted pinochle nights. Eventually, he and his sister moved into their own place and the card games moved there. We’d sit around drinking Bud Light listening to 580 CKWW or WCXI and play cards all night. So many nights of crazy conversations about music, movies, and TV.

Steve M – October 19

Steve and I had probably met before, but we really got to know each other because of Alumni Band. I remembered that alumni had played once or twice at homecoming while I was still in school. When I graduated, I wanted to make sure that the tradition continued. So I bugged the band director and we threw it together. The first year was a small group. The second year it was a little bigger. It was a way for us to get together and play and have fun.

Steve and I hit it off immediately. We both were trumpet players. I knew his younger brother, Jeff, because he was my brother’s age. He was also a DJ and did weddings and we loved to talk music. He hosted some alumni band BBQ’s and was a key part in the success of the group.

I am not sure exactly how we ended up DJing together. I think it was because he had a light show and I didn’t. I brought him along and we ended up having so much fun, we kept doing it. Little by little we added things to the gigs we did. We both did this stupid Blues Brothers intro to kick off dancing. I had this bad Elvis wig and would go out and sing to a female wedding guest (story about the wig in a sec). We had blow up instruments and silly cardboard things we’d hold up while we danced. We had a friggin blast!!

One time, Steve had his truck backed into the garage. He had the tailgate glass up and I went inside to comb the Elvis wig down. I used to put it on my head and comb it down before I put it on this stupid Styrofoam head I had. I was in his bathroom combing and I heard the truck start and all of a sudden a huge crash. I walked to the door of the garage and saw that the tailgate glass had caught the garage door and shattered all over the place. I stood there, wearing that dumb wig, and asked what happened. At the time, it wasn’t funny (It was raining, we were running late, when we got the gig, Steve had forgotten his shoes, so I went to Kmart to buy him a pair, it was a mess!). We look back now and Steve will still laugh, “You were standing there wearing the King’s hair!” After weddings, it was tradition to grab White Castle hamburgers! Some of my favorite gigs were DJing for cancer benefits or VFW steak outs. When Steve M was living in his apartment, his crazy neighbor (who we called Fruit Loops) used to always come out when we were loading or unloading for DJ gigs. I wonder what happened to her….LOL

Steve M, Steve K, Joe, and I spent many nights singing karaoke. We used to have so much fun. We’d go to these two dive bars – McGee’s and Grady’s. We’d drink, sing songs and laugh like hell. We all had specific songs we used to do. We used to have these guys who’d get up and sing that we’d make fun of. There was a guy who looked and sounded like Bela Lugosi! He’d sing Let Me Call You Sweetheart with that accent! Then there was “Opera Man”. We called him that because every song he sang, he’d sing it like he was one of the Three Tenors! I would sing harmony for Steve M on Losing My Religion a lot. We’d have such a fun time! Now, he is actually hosting karaoke every week at a few places. I’m over due to get out and sing!

Steve K – October 28

Steve and I became friends in junior high, in the same class as Joe. Here’s the thing – we almost didn’t stay friends. Admittedly, we all kind of picked on Steve. We razzed him – a lot. Steve and I both played trumpet. Now I am not sure why he found my trumpet to be better than his. I do know that he would often switch his with mine. Well, one day he was walking in the band room and he dropped “his” horn and bent the bell. I laughed. We all did. I probably said something like “You idiot! Nice job!” or something like that. He looked at me sheepishly while I laughed and said, “Uh, Keith….this is YOUR trumpet.” My laughter stopped and I grabbed him by the throat! Our band director, Mr. Mest, came running over and pulled us both into the office.

Steve and I were in 2nd hour with each other. After the “incident” we went to the next class. I was still upset about the whole thing and kept egging him on throughout the class. I was calling him names, and just being an ass. He finally got up and walked over to me as I was talking to our buddy Warren. He grabbed the desk I was sitting in and literally flipped it over – with me still in it! It totally took me by surprise! Needless to say, we both were sent to the office. I don’t know if detention was given or not, but I know we both got “yellow slips”. This was bad, I just don’t know or remember how bad.

I think our dad’s ended up having to talk to each other about the incident and arrangements were made to take care of the horn. I think we both got a “talking to” by our dads and we stayed friends. We always seemed to be together. We sat next to each other in band for as long as I can remember. I often call Steve “Norton” because he reminded me so much to Ed Norton on the Honeymooners. He’d say some of the silliest things. We’d laugh all the time. That Senior Skip Day, he even golfed like Norton did in that episode of the Honeymooners!

The only real time I got in trouble in band class was with Steve. The other trumpets always waited for us to bring up our horns. They never seemed to count the rests. So Steve and I were talking and saying “Let’s bring up our horns early and fool those guys.” Well, we were rehearsing for band festival and the band director was in no mood for jokes. He stopped the music and asked what we were talking about. When I told him he simply pointed to the door and said “Bye.” We were told to wait until after rehearsal and then talk to him afterward. We both felt like crap. You just didn’t tick off the band director – not when festival was the next day! We were allowed back to rehearsal shortly afterward, but we both still felt stupid!

We’d spend hours in the car driving around. I would make “driving tapes” and we’d pile in and spend the night driving around the neighborhood. We’d cruise Gratiot and look at girls. We’d drive with the windows down, jamming to our favorite songs and singing at the top of our lungs. We’d harmonize to Huey Lewis & the News, Jerry Lee Lewis, Frankie Ford, and so many other artists. It was what we did!

He was with me when I got my first speeding ticket (on my way to Sam’s Jams) and he was with me when I had my first car accident. I was driving in my ’79 Caprice Classic (ok, my dad’s ’79 Caprice Classic) and it had rained. I was going to his house to drop him off. I made the left turn and the roads were wet. I began to go into a skid (rear wheel drive). I remembered Driver’s Ed class “turn into the skid”, and I did. Too bad I was literally in front of a parked car when I turned into the skid. I slammed into the front of this car! Steve’s mom called my dad. I was in shock. I knew I was a dead man. My dad drove over and walked right past me and looked at the car. I heard him mumble under his breath “There’s about $1500 worth of damage here.” I later said, “You didn’t ask about me at all!” to which my dad replied, “I saw you standing there – I knew you were ok!”

I don’t recall if it was our senior year or not, but we had a band trip to Cedar Point. I am not a ride person. Steve, me and Chris walked around most of the day probably looking at girls. We stumbled on this “You Be the Star” booth. This was LONG before karaoke was a thing. You went into a sound booth, put headphones on and sang to an instrumental track of a song. Then, you got a cassette tape of your recording. I think we did Twist and Shout, Steve did Mack the Knife (which would become his karaoke theme song), and we all did Hip to Be Square by Huey Lewis. The song had just come out and he said he knew it, so he sang lead on it. Chris and I sang the “Hip. Hip. So Hip to be Square” lines in the background. I think I may still have that tape!

At my graduation party, my dad and some of his band buddies set up and played music at the party. My dad had typed up the lyrics to Weird Al’s parody of La Bamba (Lasagna) and his band played it while me, Joe and Steve all sang it. Steve was leaving to go to basic training soon after we graduated. It was sad to know my buddy was going to be leaving. I’m not sure what happened, but he never ended up staying in the navy. He did, however, move to one of the Carolinas for awhile. I’d get in trouble for long distance calls to him talking about stupidity…LOL. He would tell me all about these silly sweepers he’d hear on a station called The Frog out there!

When he moved back to Michigan, Steve also used to DJ with me. He would bring these crazy songs I had never heard before and want me to play them. Sometimes they’d work, sometimes they didn’t. One day, Steve M and I were DJing at the VFW right by Steve K’s house. He came to the event. He was dancing like crazy on the dance floor. I think his wife wanted to go home and he wanted to stay. She left and went home. He had to call her later to come pick him back up because while he was out on the floor dancing he split his pants! Typical Steve. Stuff like that happened to him all the time! That is one of my favorite Steve stories.

He was always my pinochle partner when we played with my grandparents (and when we played with Tonya, Michelle and the gang). You could always count on him having the Ace of Clubs! A trickless is when you and your partner take every possible trick in the hand. Steve and I pulled one against my grandparents once. It pissed my grandpa (who was very competitive) off! The next hand, we pulled another one! That was the end of the card playing that night! Grandpa was done! Somewhere, I still have the yellow legal pad with those back to back trickless hands written on it!

One day, we were all playing cards at Tonya’s house and the “F You’s” were flying around the table. Steve meant to say, “F You and the horse you rode in on”, but instead said “the horse you rode on in.” I am not sure why that made us all laugh so hard, but it did. To this day, I say it wrong – because of Steve! I am sure I could devote an entire blog to some of the silly things Steve has said.

He recently had a stroke. That being said, he is recovering well. I have to tell you though, when I heard the news I was scared! This is my buddy and I can’t imagine not having him around. When I went to the hospital to see him, I was like all emotional. I hid it very well, but here is a guy, one of my closest friends, who was my age (not even 50!) and this happened to him. I was happy that he was ok, and that the prognosis was good, but just knowing that it could have been a very different outcome freaked me out. It was an eye opening experience. I guess that’s why I am writing this blog.

I want these three guys to know how glad I am to have their friendship. We all share a love of music. We all have the same taste in movies. We all love a funny joke or pun. We have all shared silly conversations, as well as deep serious conversations. I have one blood brother, but I am blessed to have these guys as brothers and friends. In 30+ years, I have been lucky enough to share laughter and tears with these guys. All of them stood up in my first wedding and I stood up in Joe’s and Steve K’s weddings. We can go months without chatting and then pick right up where we left off. Conversations always include laughter, movie quotes, and a whole lot of love.

Even though two of them have already celebrated theirs, and one is a few days away – Happy Birthday, Boys. I love you guys! Thank you for being such amazing friends for so many years!

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Joe, my brother Chris, Me, Steve M. Jeff, and Steve K at my first wedding.

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Beers are overdue!