Thanks, Annie Lennox

This song was a bit appropriate yesterday.

We have a shower with sliding glass doors. If you have them, you know what a pain they are to keep clean! We’ve used Scrubbing Bubbles, Ajax, Magic Erasers, and just about every known cleaner to get the soap scum off them, but nothing worked. Sam said that she wanted me to take the shower doors off. She wanted to get a shower curtain rod and get rid of the doors altogether.

So yesterday evening, I was trying to get these doors off. It took me a second to realize that there was a stopper on the other side of the frame that I had to unscrew and take off before I could get the doors off.

I had Sam stay in the bathroom and hold the one door that was leaning against the shower wall while I took door number one outside to the trash. It was a bit of a challenge opening the door to get outside, but I got it out with no issues.

I came back inside to get door number two. I got it out of the shower, walked it to the side door, got it out on the porch, and as I turned to set it next to the other door, the whole thing explodes. I had glass on my head and back, and shattered glass was all over the driveway. It is then that I noticed my middle finger on my left had is bleeding pretty good.

I shook off the glass that was on me and opened the door and hollered to Sam to please bring me a Band Aid. I grabbed the big push broom and started to sweep the glass up. It was everywhere – even in the grass. Sam brought me a bandage and I put it on and continued to sweep. It seemed like the broom wasn’t even doing anything.

I was getting frustrated, so I went to the garage and pulled on my little shop vac. This is the smallest shop vac you can buy. You have to empty it like every 5 minutes. But, here I am standing on my driveway vacuuming up glass shards. It was taking forever!

Sam, in the calmest wifely voice she can muster, says to me, “Why don’t you use the broom and sweep up as much as you can? You can scoop it up with the dustpan.” Well, I’m a dumb guy. I know it will take longer if I use a dustpan, so I grabbed the snow shovel! Here I am sweeping this mess up into a snow shovel and then dumping it into a regular garbage bag. It weighs a ton, so I know that I can only put a little in each bag.

As I am tying up the first bag to put into the trash can, I can see the glass is breaking through the bag. So I hurry up and just throw it in the can. I do this three or four more times. Finally, I grab my trusty and crappy shop vac and begin to go back over the driveway to suck up the pieces I missed. I’m still not done.

I know that somewhere on Facebook and unknown neighbor who just happened to be driving down my street posted, “I just drove down the street and one of my dumb neighbors was out vacuuming his driveway and his grass! What an idiot!”