Friday Photo Flashback

I know Christmas is over, but my neighbor still has his lights out, so here is a Christmas photo for this week’s Friday Photo Flashback. Christmas 1980.

What you have here is 10 year old Keith. (Good Lord, it’s Christmas! You’d have thought I would brush my hair!) I am holding the cribbage board that my Grandpa and Grandma D gave me. This would have been Grandpa’s last Christmas.

I don’t recall exactly when he started to teach me how to play cribbage. Maybe I was 8 or 9. I know I was easy to beat, as I often forgot to count things. My grandpa taught me how to play on his board. The board was old and I think he had it around the time of World War II. When he passed away, my grandma said he would have wanted me to have it. (I still do!)

If you beat him on his board, he let you sign the back of it. If memory serves me right, there are three signatures on it. One of his buddies, my dad, and me. I had bought a small board to play on and we played on it a couple times. If my grandpa “skunked” me, he got to sign the back of my board. The two games we played on my board – he won both times!

He used to call me Charlie. “Skunked Charlie on this board (date) H.D. And we know who Charlie is don’t we” is his first signing. The first allowed him to write a shorter bit next. “Did it again 12-31-80 – on New Year’s Eve!

I still have the “29” cribbage board. There are a couple signatures on the back from friends who have skunked me on my board, too.

At one point, I taught my second son, Dimitri, how to play, but he hasn’t been over for a while. I guess I will just have to teach Ella or Andrew how to play …

Friday Photo Flashback

Welcome to the first Friday Photo Flashback of 2023. Every once in a while I will be looking for a particular picture and stumble on another. That is the case with today’s featured picture. I came across it while I was searching for a picture from yesterday’s blog.

I truly do not know a lot about this picture. If I had to guess, I would say I am 3 or 4 years old here.

I know that this was taken in Grandma and Grandpa D’s back yard. Whoever took the photo is standing directly in front of the sliding patio door. Directly behind me would be my grandparent’s house. Right up against it was an ugly green metal rocker/couch. It had metal holes in it shaped like squares and you’d get up with the imprints of them on the back of your legs.

To my left in the photo and on the other side of the picnic table, I can see the popular lawn furniture of the era! Remember those aluminum chairs with the straps?

Everyone had these and they were the chairs of choice before the fold up ones everyone uses today. Someone is sitting in the chair in front of the picnic table in the photo. I wish I knew who it was. If I had to guess, it is probably my grandma. Of course, it could be my mom or even my great grandma.

The table is obviously made up for some sort of outdoor dinner or lunch. It looks like 8 plates are set. Grilled burgers or hot dogs, perhaps? I only say that because it looks like a bottle of ketchup on the table next to some red and white napkins.

The bowl at the end of the table looks like a Tupperware bowl. It is anyone’s guess as to what is in the bowl, but I would say that if was the turquoise colored Pyrex bowl, it would have been grandma’s marshmallow fruit salad. I always seem to remember it being in that bowl.

The picnic table was there as long as I can remember. I also remember that wooden half privacy fence. In later years, when I would go to cut grandma’s grass, I remember it starting to fall apart.

It looks like there might be a pack of cigarettes at the end of the table. I may be wrong. I thought it might be Marlboro, but upon looking at the packaging, there are not two red areas on the pack.

Then I thought about how much my grandma loved playing Gin. She may have even played bridge. Maybe they played pinochle. I don’t know, but it could very well be a deck of cards on the table.

I admit I had to take a minute to think about my grandparent’s back yard. What else do I remember? My aunt had a swing set back there. I’d have to ask my aunt if she remembers more, because I could be wrong. I want to say that it looked like this:

For some reason, I can’t recall if it had the bench swing (on the right) or the two seater thingy (on the left) or both. For some reason I remember a tree being close to the swing set, maybe up against one of the ends.

I also remember a rose bush up against the back of the house which often yielded pink or white roses. It may have been right up against the chimney. I know there were also rose bushes on the side of the house.

The one thing I remember most about my grandma’s back yard was that there was a huge fence along the back. There was a swinging gate that opened and closed which led to a cemetery! We didn’t go in there much, but there were times we did. I think my aunt used to tell my brother and I spooky stories about going back there. All I know if I was never out back when it was dark! Even when I was older, I made sure to be there early enough to mow before it got dark!!

This is one of those instances where I wish I could take the picture and “uncrop” it! I would love to see more of the back yard and I would love to see who is sitting there with me.

Cast the Movie of Your Life

The Word Press App on my phone will offer a daily writing prompt to bloggers. I subscribe to a few “prompt” emails and such, and they can certainly be thought starters. Today’s prompt was one I had considered before and I may have even been asked a similar question by a Facebook friend. The prompt:

They are making a movie about your life. Cast it. (Keith adds – with any actors living or dead)

My thoughts on this are to jot down what comes to mind immediately for some (not all) of my family, and a few friends (other friends may request I suggest an actor/actress for them if they really want me to). I will then continue to ponder the question and see if, after thinking it over, I would change any of my choices.

Dom Deluise – No Brainer. This has always been my answer to this question!

My wife, Sam –

This was tough. I tried to think of who might look like her and carry herself like Sam. Toss up between Charlize Theron and Olivia Wilde.

My Dad

I’m not sure there would be any better than Jackie Gleason to play my dad

My Mom

Who in the world could play my mom? Tough question and still not really sure, but I forced myself to pick someone. At times, Cathy Bates’ facial expressions remind me of her, so for now – that’ my pick.

My Brother – Chris

Really difficult pick. So just because it will either make him laugh (and he needs that, because he is recovering from Covid) or it will make him mad… William Shatner (Because I wanted to post this stupid picture!)

My Grandma and Grandpa P

Estelle Getty on Golden Girls WAS my grandma! I always felt Abe Vigoda looked like my grandpa, so there ya go.

My Grandma and Grandpa D.

I have always felt like at times, Betty White reminded me of my grandma. My grandpa was tall, a bit heavy, and always smiling. John Goodman reminds me of him.

My best friend, Jeff

Another no brainer. I’ve said for years that he reminds me of Robin Williams.

My friend Steve K.

Steve always has some sort of crazy fact that seems unbelievable to tell. So, he would be John Ratzenberger – but John Ratzenberger AS Cliff Claven from Cheers.

My friend Joe K.

Joe is probably one of the smartest guys I know. At first, I couldn’t get Jeff Goldblum out of my head, and then I though Rainn Wilson is a bit more “Joe” to me.

My friend Steve M.

Steve and I wear our hair the same. My first choice was Vin Diesel, but then I though Michael Chiklis looked more like him (and he played Curly in a Three Stooges movie, so he wins).

My friend Margaret M.

She’s Italian. She’s fiesty. She is strong. She is an expert at inserting profanity into conversation. Without a doubt – Marisa Tomei.

My friend, Chris B,

Tall and funny = Conan O’Brien

Uh …… I’m Stumped

Now, as far as my kids …. I’m just not sure. My older boys (Dante’ and Dimitri) have personalities that are very established. Ella does in a sense as well. Andrew is just a smiling happy baby. How do I begin to pick who will play them? I just don’t know….

It’s my blog and my rules. Let me think a bit on this ….

If I left you out …. and you want me to think about who will play you – let me know. In the meantime ….

Go ahead and cast YOUR life. Who would play YOU?

Has it really been 40 years?!

The man in the picture above is my grandpa. He was my mom’s dad. In February of 2018, I blogged about him in the following blog on his birthday:

I only got 11 years …

As I was going through my Facebook memories, I realized that it was 40 years ago today that he passed away. It was the first time in my life I ever had to deal with someone close to me dying. As an 11 year old kid, this rocked my world. It was one of those days that is forever etched in my memory.

I recall the phone ringing early that morning. I remember my mom frantically running around, calling my dad at work, and waking my brother and I up. The call was from my grandmother, who had received a call that my grandfather was in Muskegon hospital and had a heart attack. There obviously were many other phone calls to others as everyone rushed to get dressed and out the door.

My brother and I were obviously NOT going to school that day. My parents dropped me off at my other grandparents house for the day. They immediately headed to my grandmother’s to pick her up. I believe my aunt and uncle met them there and they all drove to Muskegon (an approximately 3 hour drive).

Along the way, if memory serves me correctly, my dad was pulled over for speeding. Once the officer heard what was going on, they received a police escort to the hospital. By the time they arrived, however, it was too late. My grandfather had already passed away.

1980 – Christmas Eve – Grandma and Grandpa at the familiar dining table with the huge wooden spoon and fork on the wall.

From the time we were dropped off at my grandparents, my grandma tried to keep us occupied. While much of that time is a blur, I remember when the phone rang and my grandma answered the phone. I remember seeing her get visibly shaken and asked many questions. I recall being anxious to find out what was going on. That is when my grandma slowly got up from the table, hung the phone back up on the wall and sat down next to us on the couch.

“I’m sorry, boys. Grandpa died at the hospital.” I remember crying and not even knowing why I was crying! None of it made any sense to me. I asked when he was coming home and was told that he wasn’t. I remember hoping that it was all a dream or just some false information. I just couldn’t comprehend it all.

I had never been to a funeral in my life. I had never seen anyone in a casket. I remember the days prior to the funeral and a lot of people in and out of my grandma’s house. I recall standing out in the driveway in between cars questioning God as to why this was happening. I just didn’t understand it.

I saw how upset my grandma, my mom, and my aunts were. I saw how it affected my dad and his parents. My cousins were still really too young to grasp any of what was going on. I am not sure my brother really did either. While watching all of them, and seeing how they were feeling, I still couldn’t figure out what I was feeling either!

Grandma holding me while Grandpa looks on …

As with most funerals, there is a time for just family to come in. I recall my mom, my aunts, and my grandma crying. I was scared to go up to the casket. I remember my dad asking me if I was ok and if I wanted to go up there. He knew I was scared and told me it was ok. I remember it being very weird. There was my grandpa, who was always so full of life and laughing, just laying there. I touched his hand and remember being freaked out at how cold he was. My dad did the best he could to explain things to me. I just didn’t get it. Perhaps, I didn’t want to get it. I think deep down, I didn’t want any of it to be real!

One thing that really stands out in my memory about that day was the amount of people who paid their respects to him. There were SO many people there. Family, friends, sales associates, and more. I met many people that he knew while at the funeral home. My grandma, or my mom, or my dad would introduce me to someone and they all had nice things to say about him. “You’re grandpa was a great friend,” “You’re grandpa loved you,” “You’re grandpa was very special to me,” and on and on. I knew how much he meant to me, but to see all the people that knew him, loved him, and respected him … I had a whole new view of him. His life crossed paths with many people and he made an impression. He was loved by more people than I realized.

Grandpa and me – Christmas 1970. I am 7 months old here

I remember going to church with him as a kid. I often sat next to him and would draw pictures in the church bulletin. I would draw pictures of Jonah and the whale, Jesus coming out of the tomb, or just pictures of rainbows and such. I have long forgotten what his voice sounded like, but I remember his voice booming when he sang a hymn at church.

My grandma had an end table in their living room that had doors on it. Inside the table was a stack of coloring books and crayons. I didn’t often listen to what the adults talked about, but one conversation I over heard parts of and I vividly recall my grandpa saying to someone, “One day I’ll see my Savior face to face and that will be amazing.”

I don’t really know how I came to be the one who got this, but I know that this was something that my grandpa carried around in his wallet. It was folded in half. The cross is a bit crushed now, but I still have it:

In a way, the above poem brings comfort to me. I know that my grandpa has indeed met his Savior face to face. I also know that in the future, so will I. There will also be a wonderful reunion in the future, and I will see him again.

40 years have flown by. So many milestones and changes have occurred. Yet so many things surrounding the events of September 24, 1981 are as clear as ever in my memory. As I stated in my previous blog:

The first real life lesson was learned by me that September. If there is someone special in your life who means something to you – tell them! If you love someone – tell them! Never pass up the opportunity to hug or kiss someone! You may never get the chance to do it again.

I was truly lucky to have had 11 wonderful years with him in my life.

Gone Fishing

One of my favorite fishing jokes comes from Soupy Sales:

Two guys are out on a boat fishing and one guy is pulling in all the fish. His fishing buddy hasn’t had even a nibble the whole time they’ve been on the lake. So, he asks his buddy what his secret is.

“Well, when I wake up in the morning I look at my wife. If she is sleeping on her left side, then I fish off the left side of the boat. If she is sleeping on her right side, I fish off the right side of the boat.”

His buddy asks, “Well, what if she’s sleeping on her back?” The guy says, “Then brother, I certainly don’t go fishing!!”

First Fishing Memory

Before my grandparents bought their trailer in Caseville, we would occasionally go up and stay at the trailer owned by my great aunt. I remember my dad and my grandpa took me out to a small lake (pictured above) where I first was grossed out by putting a worm on a hook. That lake would eventually be right behind the lot where my grandparents trailer would be.

I remember my grandpa helping me with the bobber that would float in the water. I also remember my dad putting a bell on the end of my fishing rod. There was no way a 7 or 8 year old kid could miss a fish if the bell rang and the bobber was pulled under the surface of the lake. Sure enough the bell rang and the bobber went under and I started reeling in.

What was on the end of the line was the ugliest catfish you have ever seen! There was no way I was touching that thing and my grandpa grabbed it, pulled it off the hook, and tossed it back in the lake. The lake was stocked by the guy who lived across the street from my grandparents as I recall. There were perch, bluegill, catfish, and pike in the lake.

Anyway, when we got back to the trailer, I was so excited. I told my mom, my grandma, and everyone else who would listen that I caught a fish. I don’t think there was a phone at my aunt’s place, and I asked my dad how I could let my other grandparents know about my fishing expedition. He suggested I write a letter, which I did. I am sure we never mailed it, but I did tell him about it when we saw them.

Uglier than the catfish? Yes.

When we weren’t fishing at the back lake, we would go and fish of the pier in Caseville. I remember going to the store and my dad buying us some cheap plastic tackle boxes for when we went fishing. I don’t remember for sure, but I am almost positive that it was my brother who knocked my grandpa’s tackle box off the pier and into the water. One of my favorite pictures of my brother and I was taken on the pier. As you can see, I obviously dressed myself … what the hell am I wearing in this picture?!

One day while fishing off the pier, my mother got a bite. She fought and fought whatever fish was on the end of the line. I remember the excitement of wanting to know what it was. When she pulled it out of the water, it was a huge sheephead. I remember my grandpa saying that those were great fighters, but that was about all they were good for.

A few years later, I caught a fish off the pier and brought the dumb, smelly thing home with me, so I could get a picture with it. I used to love this silly “fishing” hat I am wearing in the picture.

Skidway Lake

There was another fishing trip that I took with some friends from school. We all went up to my pal Steve’s mom and dad’s place. I believe that the fishing trip only consisted of one trip to the lake to fish. The rest of the time was spent by campfires drinking beer and telling stories.

My best friend had quite a few that night and when we all went to bed I could hear him getting sick. I chuckled about this at the time, but when I woke up in the morning and found that he had puked in my shoes, it wasn’t so funny.

The actual fishing was fairly disappointing. These fish were fairly tiny. I think Jeff pulled in the biggest fish of the day, and it was nothing to write home about!

Fishing with my boys

I’m not sure why, but I only went fishing once with my sons. We went to a small lake near the house.

They were excited to go, but once they got there, they got bored quickly. I instantly remembered feeling that way as a kid. I would cast into the lake and want a fish immediately! I didn’t want to just sit there waiting.

When a fish finally did bite, they were so tiny, they could have been used as bait!!

It has been forever since I went fishing. As a matter of fact, that fishing trip with the boys was the last time I went. I’m sure that if I opened up my tackle box, it is probably a mess. I don’t even know if I still have my fishing pole. I may have to go out the garage to see if my pole is still out there.

All I need now is a few friends (one of them hopefully with a boat) and a day off to go fishing….I’m long over due to drop a line in the water. Where’s my bobber?

Time. Life. Death. Ripples.

ccf258c663c06ef7921f28df717da99c492b72cev2_hq

The longest song I ever played on the air was Alice’s Restaurant by Arlo Guthrie which is just over 18 minutes long. We played this on the classic rock station (and sometimes on the oldies station) every Thanksgiving. To those who love the song, it was the perfect length. To those who hated the song, it went on too long. Their feelings about the song depended on their perception of time. (Incidentally, the shortest song I ever played on the radio was Her Majesty by the Beatles. I think it clocks in at just over 20 seconds long.)

Time. I have found myself thinking a lot about time over the past month or so. I have had the word “time” written on my list of blog topics for a while, but have never felt that I am ready to blog about it. In all honesty, I am still not ready, but I had to write something to clear my head.

There is no shortage of great quotes about time:

“Time is what we want most, but what we use worst” – William Penn

“Time isn’t the main thing. It’s the only thing” – Miles Davis

“Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted” – John Lennon

“Lost time is never found again” – Benjamin Franklin

Time is one of those things that is constantly moving. It moves second by second. Hour by hour. Day by day. Year by year. The truth of the matter is that time is constant. 3 minutes is 3 minutes. How one perceives that 3 minutes depends on the situation. In some cases, 3 minutes can feel like 10 minutes. In others it can feel like just 1 minute. Think of an 8 hour work day and compare it to 8 hours on vacation. Vacation time is flying by while the clock at work moves slowly.

Earlier this month, Facebook was flooded with “First Day of School” pictures. My friends posted pictures with captions that read: “Where did the time go?”, “Wasn’t she just in kindergarten?”, “How did he grow up so fast?”, and “Last First Day of School”. I can relate to that last one as my oldest son started his Senior year this year. My Facebook “Memories” feed has been full of my own kid’s “first day of school” pictures, and I, too, have wondered those same questions.

So why am I rambling about time??

97370400dce09769f5a88422453107ea

In my 49 years on this planet, I have lost many people close to me, many at a young age. Some of them, I have blogged about: my mom (who was only 58), my grandpa (mom’s dad, also 58), my radio buddy, Rob (only 56), and my Uncle Tom (just 68). This week, I found out a good friend passed away unexpectedly at only 47 and another friend was basically told her days are numbered – she is 48. I can’t imagine how time will proceed for her.

I understand that death is a part of life. I am reminded of a quote from my psychology class that said, “The hardest part of losing someone isn’t having to say goodbye, but rather learning to live without them – always having to fill the void, the emptiness that’s left inside your heart when they go.” This is so true. Leo Buscaglia said, “Death is a challenge. It tells us not to waste time.” Also true. Bruce Lee, who died at the young age of 32, said, “If you love life, don’t waste time, for time is what life is made up of.”

I sit here staring at this computer screen and my thoughts are all over the place. Is this blog about Time or Death? I don’t know. I guess they both tie together somehow in my mind. I guess Life also ties in with them. “Live every day as if it were your last. Someday, you’ll be right.” That quote, which I read on the band room announcement grease board 31 years ago, will always remain with me.

The more I think about it, the more I realize that those three things (life, death, and time) do all go together. Looking back at the people I have quoted, they have all passed away, yet their words are still here making an impact. I guess this proves the quote of another person who is no longer here. The late author Terry Pratchett says this: “No one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away.”

I still talk about my mom – ripples.

I still tell stories about my Uncle Tom – ripples.

I still laugh along with Rob when I listen to our old shows – ripples.

Thinking of my buddy Rob, I remember ad-libbing a poem on the air about an upcoming station event. He looked at me and his Elvis character voice he said to me, “Man! You’re a real Carl Sandburg today.” It’s probably a coincidence that I have a Carl Sandburg quote about time to share:

“Time is the coin of your life. It’s the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.” – Carl Sandburg

____

As I re-read this blog, I realize that it is a jumbled mess of thoughts. For that I apologize to anyone who has ever read my blog and said “You’re a good writer.” Usually my blogs have a point to them, I am not sure this one does. Hell, I don’t even have a title yet! I really wish I had planned this out a little better. Tell you what, for now, let’s say this blog is a “tease” to the “real” blog about “time” to come at a future date. And as far as the point, or moral, or lesson? Uh….how bout this….

Make good use of your time and live your life so that you will be forever causing ripples.

3-water-ripples-pasieka