Tag: Paul Harvey

These Things I Wish – Lee Pitts

A friend posted this on Facebook today and I felt it was worth sharing. As a radio guy, when I saw it attributed to Paul Harvey, I wanted to be sure that was correct. I found the following at the Snopes website:

Origins:   The essay reproduced above has circulated on the Internet for several years prefaced with a statement indicating it is “from Paul Harvey,” an attribution which is somewhat ambiguous — does it mean that the late radio commentator wrote the essay, or that he popularized it? It’s unclear which concept the original e-mailer was trying to communicate, so we’ll answer both questions in preference to guessing what was in that person’s mind.

Paul Harvey didn’t write this essay. The true author of the piece is Lee Pitts and the nostalgic composition was published (under the title “These Things I Wish”) in his 1995 book People Who Live at the End of Dirt Roads and appeared in the 2000 “Chicken Soup for the Golden Soul” collection.

However, Paul Harvey used material written by Lee Pitts in his daily news and commentary radio segments from time to time, and he did read this particular essay (crediting Pitts, of course) during his September 6, 1997 broadcast.

Here is the version posted on Facebook:

These Things I Wish


We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse.

For my grandchildren, I’d like better.


I’d really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches.. I really would.


I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.


I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car. And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.


It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep.


I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.


I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And it’s all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he’s scared, I hope you let him.


When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you’ll let him/her.


I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.


On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don’t ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won’t be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.


If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.
I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.


When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.


I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy / girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.


May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.


I don’t care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don’t like it… And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he/she is not your friend.


I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle.


May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.


I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor’s window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.


These things I wish for you – tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness.

To me, it’s the only way to appreciate life.

_________________________________________________________

Snopes, however, has a similar, yet slightly different version (I’m not quite sure which one is the original):

These Things I Wish

We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse.

For my grandchildren, I’d know better.

I’d really like for them to know about hand-me-down clothes and home-made ice cream and leftover meatloaf. I really would.

My cherished grandson, I hope you learn humility by surviving failure and that you learn to be honest even when no one is looking.

I hope you learn to make your bed and mow the lawn and wash the car — and I hope nobody gives you a brand-new car when you are sixteen.

It will be good if at least one time you can see a baby calf born, and you have a good friend to be with you if you ever have to put your old dog to sleep.

I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.

I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother. And it is all right to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he’s scared, I hope you’ll let him.

And when you want to see a Disney movie and your kid brother wants to tag along, I hope you take him.

I hope you have to walk uphill with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.

If you want a slingshot, I hope your father teaches you how to make one instead of buying one. I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books, and when you learn to use computers, you also learn how to add and subtract in your head.

I hope you get razzed by friends when you have your first crush on a girl, and that when you talk back to your mother you learn what Ivory soap tastes like.

May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on the stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.

I hope you get sick when someone blows smoke in your face. I don’t care if you try beer once, but I hope you won’t like it. And if a friend offers you a joint or any drugs, I hope you are smart enough to realize that person is not your friend.

I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your grandpa or go fishing with your uncle.

I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through a neighbor’s window, and that she hugs you and kisses you when you give her a plaster of paris mold of your hand.

These things I wish for you — tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness.

Paul Harvey – If I Were The Devil

As a former radio broadcaster, I always appreciated the great Paul Harvey. I discovered him in the late 80’s to early 90’s and tried to listen to him whenever I could up until he retired. It wasn’t until a few years ago that I heard an audio version of this 1965 broadcast. Rereading it today after it was posted by a friend, it is almost scary. If you’ve never read this, please do. The audio is probably available on YouTube.

Stolen from my friend:

In 1965, Paul Harvey broadcasted “If I Were the Devil.” It is really amazing to realize over 47 years ago how accurately he “prophesied” the future spiritual condition of the United States. Many of his statements were considered ridiculously outlandish at that time in history. Yet, we find ourselves today…

PAUL HARVEY’S ‘IF I WERE THE DEVIL’ TRANSCRIPT:

If I were the devil … If I were the Prince of Darkness, I’d want to engulf the whole world in darkness. And I’d have a third of its real estate, and four-fifths of its population, but I wouldn’t be happy until I had seized the ripest apple on the tree — Thee. So I’d set about however necessary to take over the United States. I’d subvert the churches first — I’d begin with a campaign of whispers. With the wisdom of a serpent, I would whisper to you as I whispered to Eve: ‘Do as you please.’“

To the young, I would whisper that ‘The Bible is a myth.’ I would convince them that man created God instead of the other way around. I would confide that what’s bad is good, and what’s good is ‘square.’ And the old, I would teach to pray, after me, ‘Our Father, which art in Washington…’

“And then I’d get organized. I’d educate authors in how to make lurid literature exciting, so that anything else would appear dull and uninteresting. I’d threaten TV with dirtier movies and vice versa. I’d pedal narcotics to whom I could. I’d sell alcohol to ladies and gentlemen of distinction. I’d tranquilize the rest with pills.

“If I were the devil I’d soon have families that war with themselves, churches at war with themselves, and nations at war with themselves; until each in its turn was consumed. And with promises of higher ratings I’d have mesmerizing media fanning the flames. If I were the devil I would encourage schools to refine young intellects, but neglect to discipline emotions — just let those run wild, until before you knew it, you’d have to have drug sniffing dogs and metal detectors at every schoolhouse door.

“Within a decade I’d have prisons overflowing, I’d have judges promoting pornography — soon I could evict God from the courthouse, then from the schoolhouse, and then from the houses of Congress. And in His own churches I would substitute psychology for religion, and deify science. I would lure priests and pastors into misusing boys and girls, and church money. If I were the devil I’d make the symbols of Easter an egg and the symbol of Christmas a bottle.

“If I were the devil I’d take from those who have, and give to those who want until I had killed the incentive of the ambitious.

And what do you bet I could get whole states to promote gambling as the way to get rich? I would caution against extremes and hard work in Patriotism, in moral conduct. I would convince the young that marriage is old-fashioned, that swinging is more fun, that what you see on the TV is the way to be. And thus, I could undress you in public, and I could lure you into bed with diseases for which there is no cure. In other words, if I were the devil I’d just keep right on doing what he’s doing.

… Paul Harvey, good day.”